An Inclusive Litany
3/23/92
In a Newcastle-upon-Tyne crown court, Mr. Alan Cooper was
accused of "outraging public decency." As the
Times
of London reported it, the prosecution accused Mr. Cooper of
"committing a lewd, obscene, and disgusting act on the 12-foot
dolphin called Freddie as they frolicked for 20 minutes off the harbor
mouth at Amble, Northumberland." Freddie has become somewhat of a
tourist attraction and according to the prosecution, "a boatload of
onlookers watched 'disgusted' as Mr. Cooper, wearing a blue and yellow
wet suit, masturbated the half-ton mammal as it floated on its back."
Mr. Cooper, the
Times
helpfully adds, is unmarried.