After years of research, the Drug Enforcement Agency claims to have come up with a scientifically valid profile of the typical drug carrier. The DEA is loath to reveal the traits that will lead them to search someone, but Mother Jones scoured court documents and found that the following forms of behavior have triggered actual searches: carrying new suitcases, carrying old suitcases, appearing nervous, appearing calm, buying a round-trip ticket, buying a one-way ticket, traveling alone, traveling with a companion, deplaning from the front of the airplane, deplaning from the middle of the plane, and deplaning from the rear of the plane. Try not to be so obvious!

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