An Inclusive Litany

8/5/94

A headline in the Council Bluffs, Iowa, Daily Nonpareil newspaper read, "Woman Admits to Worrying Squirrel." Christine Walter, 23, pleaded guilty to "worrying a black squirrel"; she had been changed for trespassing in Fairmont Park, but pleaded guilty to the lesser charge of "worrying a squirrel," which in this case is defined as "she drove into the park and the squirrel ran away." A city ordinance makes it an offense to "annoy, worry, maim, injure, or kill" any black squirrel, a crime that can result in a fine of $100 and 30 days in jail.