An Inclusive Litany

3/13/95

A Milwaukee-area woman filed suit against St. Florian Catholic Church, at which in 1990 she was participating in a game of bingo when an electrical display board showing the numbers collapsed on top of her. As a result, she says, she has been experiencing a series of mysterious maladies, both physical and psychological, that have cost her more than $84,000 in visits to almost 50 doctors. Among her complaints, the 72-year-old woman says she has been experiencing spontaneous multiple orgasms several times a day and has developed an irresistible sexual attraction to women.

Thomas Nangle of Springfield, Ohio, sued Kellogg's after his insurance company refused to pay for about $3,000 in damages that resulted when a Pop-Tart he was toasting in October 1992 caught fire. The insurance company was convinced that the fire was his own fault, and Nangle then sued Kellogg. In a settlement, Kellogg agreed to pay $2,400 to Nangle's insurance company, Pioneer Mutual. However, an attorney for the company said this was not an admission of guilt but rather a "nuisance settlement."

After former Philadelphia parking lot attendant Michael McAleer tripped over his toes in an elevator, he filed for disability payments, claiming that his accident induced insomnia, agitation, lightheadedness and chest pains. Since then, says McAleer, his problems have become worse, chiefly because of the negative press he has received. All the printed pooh-poohing of his case, he says, has caused him even greater stress, so he now wants triple his pension.

In another legal action resulting from a coffee spill, Darby Bullivant, a California woman, is asking for unspecified damages against the Seattle-based Starbucks coffee chain and the manufacturer of their paper cups. She claims her receptacle was flawed and had no instructions detailing its proper use.